Helping your child feel comfortable about their body

Is your child becoming more aware of their body, comparing themselves with friends, or feeling uncomfortable about changes caused by IBD?

Growing up can make children and teenagers more aware of how they look and how their bodies compare with other people’s. For children with Crohn’s disease or ulcerative colitis, this can sometimes feel even more complicated.

IBD can affect growth, weight, puberty, skin, hair, scars, bloating and body shape. Some medications can also cause temporary changes in appearance.

Your child may feel different from their friends — even when there is nothing medically wrong with their body.

Helping them develop a positive and comfortable relationship with their body isn’t about making them love every part of themselves. It’s about helping them understand that their body is changing, their worth isn’t based on appearance, and they deserve to feel comfortable and supported.

💬 Start by listening

If your child says something negative about their body, it can be tempting to immediately reassure them:

“You look completely fine!”

Although this is well intentioned, it can sometimes make a child feel like their concerns haven’t been heard.

Instead, try asking:

• “What makes you feel that way?”

• “Have you been thinking about this for a while?”

• “Is someone saying something at school?”

• “Are you worried about something changing because of your IBD?”

• “What would help you feel more comfortable?”

You don’t have to immediately fix the problem.

Sometimes simply knowing that you are willing to listen can make a big difference.

🌱 Explain that bodies develop differently

Children don’t all grow at the same speed.

Some children have growth spurts earlier, while others develop later. Puberty can also happen at different times.

This can be particularly difficult for children with IBD if their growth or puberty has been affected by active inflammation or nutritional difficulties.

Remind your child that being different from their friends doesn’t automatically mean something is wrong.

Their IBD team can monitor their growth and development and help determine whether anything needs attention.

🩺 Talk honestly about IBD-related body changes

Depending on their symptoms and treatment, your child may experience changes such as:

• weight loss or weight gain

• slower growth

• delayed puberty

• bloating or abdominal swelling

• acne

• changes in body shape

• stretch marks

• scars from procedures or surgery

• changes in hair or skin

• changes related to medications such as steroids.

Don’t pretend these changes aren’t happening.

A simple, honest explanation can help your child understand that their body hasn’t “failed” them.

For example:

“Your body has been dealing with a lot because of your IBD. Some of these changes may be part of your treatment or your body recovering. Let’s talk to your doctor if you’re worried.”

💊 Be careful when talking about medication changes

Some IBD medications can cause noticeable changes in appearance.

Corticosteroids, for example, can sometimes cause increased appetite, changes in body shape, acne or other temporary physical changes.

These effects can be particularly difficult for teenagers who are already sensitive about their appearance.

If your child is upset about a medication-related change, let their IBD team know.

Don’t stop or change prescribed medication because of appearance-related side effects without discussing it with the healthcare team.

The team may be able to explain what to expect, whether the change is temporary and whether there are ways to manage it.

🍽️ Avoid making food about weight

Food can become complicated for children with IBD.

A child may already have anxiety around eating because of abdominal pain, diarrhoea or urgency. Adding pressure to gain or lose weight can make that relationship with food even harder.

Try to focus conversations around:

• energy

• strength

• nourishment

• growth

• feeling well

• enjoying food.

Avoid labelling foods as “good” or “bad” or talking about needing to “burn off” food.

If your child needs nutritional support because of poor growth, weight changes or active IBD, a paediatric IBD dietitian can help.

🪞 Be aware of body checking

Some children may begin checking their body frequently.

They might:

• repeatedly look in the mirror

• weigh themselves often

• compare their body with friends

• pinch or examine parts of their body

• frequently ask whether they look different

• avoid mirrors or photographs

• change their clothing to hide parts of their body.

Occasional self-consciousness is common, particularly during puberty.

But if body concerns are becoming a major part of your child’s day or affecting eating, school, friendships or activities, it’s worth talking with their healthcare team.

👕 Help them feel comfortable in their clothes

Clothing can make a surprisingly big difference to confidence.

Your child may feel uncomfortable with clothes that:

• press against a painful or bloated abdomen

• draw attention to weight changes

• don’t fit after growth changes

• make medical equipment or stomas difficult to manage

• make them feel exposed or self-conscious.

Let your child have some control over what they wear.

Comfort doesn’t have to mean hiding their body. It’s about helping them feel physically and emotionally comfortable in what they choose.

🏫 Think about school and friendships

Body image concerns can become harder when children are surrounded by peers.

Your child may worry about:

• changing clothes for sport

• swimming

• using the school bathroom

• accidents

• scars

• taking medication at school

• being smaller or taller than their friends

• comments about weight or appearance.

If your child is worried about something happening at school, talk through possible solutions with them.

Their school may also be able to provide practical support and privacy where needed.

🏃 Help your child enjoy their body

Physical activity doesn’t need to be about weight.

Encourage activities that your child enjoys and that are appropriate for their health and IBD.

This could be:

• swimming

• walking

• dancing

• cycling

• team sports

• strength activities

• playing outside

• simply being active with friends.

The goal is to help children experience what their bodies can do, rather than focusing only on how their bodies look.

If your child is having an IBD flare, significant fatigue, pain or other symptoms, ask their healthcare team about appropriate activity levels.

❤️ Watch how you talk about your own body

Children notice how adults talk about their bodies.

If they regularly hear comments such as:

• “I look terrible.”

• “I need to lose weight.”

• “I can’t eat that — it’s too fattening.”

• “I hate my stomach.”

they can start to learn that bodies are something we should constantly judge or change.

You don’t have to pretend you never have insecurities.

But modelling a more neutral approach can help:

“My body has changed over time, and that’s okay. I’m focusing on looking after it.”

🧠 When body image becomes more concerning

Body dissatisfaction is common, but sometimes it can become more serious.

Speak with your child’s healthcare team if you notice:

• skipping meals or deliberately restricting food

• intense fear of gaining weight

• frequent weighing

• exercising excessively

• avoiding eating with others

• avoiding school or social activities because of appearance

• becoming very distressed about their body

• withdrawing from friends

• significant changes in mood

• rapid or unexplained weight changes

• vomiting or other attempts to control weight.

Children with IBD can be particularly vulnerable to nutritional problems, so changes in eating behaviour should be taken seriously.

Your child’s IBD team may involve a dietitian, psychologist or another healthcare professional if additional support is needed.

🗣️ What can I say to my child?

Sometimes parents know what they want to say but aren’t sure how to start the conversation.

You could try:

“Your body has been through a lot. How are you feeling about the changes you’ve noticed?”

“You don’t have to look like anyone else. Bodies develop at different times.”

“If something about your body is worrying you, you can always tell me.”

“Let’s talk to your IBD team about it. You don’t have to figure this out by yourself.”

“Your body is more than how it looks. What are some things you like about what your body can do?”

The goal isn’t to convince your child that they look perfect.

It’s to help them feel safe talking about their body without shame.

📞 When should I ask for extra help?

Talk with your child’s IBD team if body image concerns are affecting their:

• eating

• weight

• growth

• medication adherence

• school attendance

• friendships

• sport or activities

• mood

• confidence

• daily life.

You don’t have to wait until there is a serious problem before asking for support.

A paediatric IBD dietitian or mental health professional can help your child develop a healthier relationship with food and their body while taking their medical needs into account.

💛 Your child’s body is not the problem

IBD can sometimes make children feel like their bodies are different, unpredictable or difficult to control.

Your child doesn’t need to have a perfect body image every day.

What matters is helping them understand that their body deserves care and respect — including on the days when they don’t feel particularly confident.

Focus on what their body does, how it is growing and healing, and the things that make your child feel like themselves.

Your child is so much more than their IBD, their weight, their appearance or their growth chart.